Archive | September 2017

Back on Track!

Of course, now that I’ve committed myself to getting my self together and back on track, this means I’ll probably be posting a lot more. Yay! More blog activity! I’m starting all this with baby steps. And again, I’m trying to learn from the past 20 months! I have always had an issue of having this all or nothing type of attitude. Which helps with some things, but doesn’t always work for others. If I’ve learned one thing with me, it doesn’t work with food or exercise. The patterns I have noticed: I decide I’m going to start eating “right” so I go full force, no sugar, no white flour, no processed. I eat meat, vegetables, and fruit. (Wait! am I allowed to have meat…they said that’s bad for you too!) I typically go strong for 2 weeks. Then something happens and I have 1 cheat meal. Which then turns into a cheat day….weekend….week…month…you see how that works. So step one for me is that I’m not going to say I CAN’T have something. I have learned with my personality if I deprive myself of something it’s like a challenge….that little voice inside me says… “oh yea? watch this!” And I reach a point and go overboard. Cue in rummaging the cabinets for butter and powdered sugar to make icing!

Okay, so how does one find that balance to still eat healthy and not totally go off the deep end? Honestly, I am the type of person who needs structure in their lives. I thrive off of it. If I don’t have a plan or roadmap I get lost. Look! Shiney things! So I have to

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decide what I’m going to eat in advance, write it down beforehand and check it off as I do it. I know all the journals are blank and the instructions that I always thought was that you write down what you actually put in your mouth. Well good for you if you have that kind of self-control. Personally, I do not. Therefore I need a whole special set of rules…because well…I’m special…my mother told me that! My rules are to get that new journal and fill in what I’m going to eat the night before or that morning. I’m not going to pretend that I can fill this out the beginning of the week because I know that by Thursday I’m not going to feel like grilled chicken, so I’m going to try to plan the day’s meals as close to that day as possible. The only thing I’m not like that with is breakfast. For some reason, I can have the same exact breakfast every day for a month and it doesn’t bother me. Sometimes the same with lunch. But when it comes to dinner. I don’t know…I get all finicky! Dinner is my problem meal. The first step to solving this is knowing that the problem exists!

Now. I know I’m going to sit down the end of the day (or first thing in the morning…when my schedule allows) and plan out my eating plan for the day. How am I going to decide what I’m going to eat? This is where things get tricky. I would love to say that I’m not a picky eater and I’ll eat about anything. That would be a lie. I’m not crazy about steak unless it’s a tenderloin, I only like chicken cooked a certain way. Not a fan of vegetables, but I do like salad. I LOVE bread and butter. And I love anything in a cream sauce. As you can see I’m predisposed to bad eating habits just based on my likes and dislikes. This means I have to plan and work a little harder. Also with any relationship, there is going to have to be some give and take. I think that sounds fair. th (5)

When planning my meals I’m mostly going for balance. I’m going to be more concerned with the nutritional aspect of what I’m eating rather than the overall calories. Are the calories still going to be a factor…of course, but not to the extent as I have in the past. We are going to go a little off topic here for a minute. A perfect example of why I can’t do the “points” system or calories. Years ago I was on Weight Watchers and I could have 22 points a day. Great! So the way my mind works is how can I maximize the amount of food for the points. I gave up eating real food for junk. I found that I could have 22 meringue cookies for 4 points. Score! So I ate a lot of meringue cookies during that time, and I didn’t lose any weight. Yes, there were weeks I ate nothing but meringue cookies and wine. I was still within my points so…what’s the problem? I did the same thing with calories and the low-fat diet. All I’m going to say is gummy bears and jelly beans. Now you know a little of how my mind works. So no more points and no more calories (really).

I was having a discussion with my son, who seems to have a really good grasp on nutrition and exercise, and he was explaining Macros to me. Okay…. He sent me to this website that IIFYM-How-to-calculate-macros-square explained how all the macro stuff works. In short, my body needs a certain amount of nutrition to function properly. Well, duh, I knew that….I just chose not to listen. So he then sent me to the IIFYM site and said: “start there.” (not I’m not in any way affiliated with or have ever purchased anything from them. You can do a search and use any macros calculator. I’ve actually downloaded an app for my phone to check as well) You put in your information and they calculate how many calories you should eat and what percentage your macros should be. Well okay! We have the beginnings of a roadmap. For those who are going…”I’m not following…what are macros?” Macros are the percentage of Carbs, Fat, and Protein you eat. (in Weigh Watchers defense, this is what the points system is based on along with fiber…I just found a loophole to eat what I want! I need to be held responsible for real numbers!)

Okay so now I know what my macros should be AND how many calories I need. See…you really aren’t going to get away with forgoing the calorie thing. In my opinion, if you are eating the proper percentage of macros and not going off and eating a bunch of high fat and sugar you are going to come in close to your calorie goal. Most of the time! There are always exceptions and that’s why I’m still going to keep an eye on it….I’m just not putting all my focus on calories, but macros. See? Now because I just spent all this time in treatment and I’m taking certain medications I personally need to make sure I’m getting enough vitamin D. So nutrients are another aspect of this little roadmap that I’m going to be keeping an eye on. The whole basis of this is just not about making sure I don’t eat too many calories and I exercise enough. I mean yes this is a fact and plays a role in the whole weight loss plan but, I’m not JUST concerned about losing WEIGHT! I’m working on my overall health. So I need to pay attention to the amounts of nutrients and types of nutrients going into my body. iifym

Nutrition and food is the part I struggle with the most. I have my macros calculator and my daily eating menu. I plan what I’m going to eat prior to putting anything in my mouth. I check off as I consume what is on my list. And then at the end of the day, I enter it all into MyFitnessPal (no don’t work with them either, just the app I use). This will show me where I landed with my macros and nutrition for the day. I look at it and see what I could improve on and then plan for the next day.

Now that I have the food thing figured out. We move on to exercise. Again. I tend to overdo it and go in full force. Again, what I have learned the last 20 months is to listen to your body. Just recently I decided I was going to add a little weight and reps to my upper body workout. Well, I must have done an exercise I haven’t tried since surgery and totally jacked up my shoulder. Yeah…don’t do that! It’s okay to start out slow. It’s okay to not do all the reps and all sets and all the weight at first! Listen to your body! Start out slow. Add slowly. Same thing with cardio. Geeze…work up to that. After surgery, I started walking. Every week I would walk a little longer and a little further. Then I started to add in some running. I would walk and then jog for 30 seconds. I slowly built up and after a year I’m up to running 2 miles without stopping. (not every day though! Haven’t reached that goal yet!) I eventually added weights. Very slowly. I do yoga once a week (should do it more) I stretch, swim, dance, hike and anything else I feel like! The most important thing I’ve found with exercise is to find something you like to do. YOU like to do! If you don’t like it, you won’t do it. balance-rings

I have gone through a thing where I’m exercising 5 days a week and I can’t figure out why I’m not losing weight. Well, the one thing I’ve learned with weight loss and getting healthy is you need ALL components of health. Nutrition is number 1. I don’t care what anyone says if you aren’t putting the right fuel into your body nothing is going to go right. (I could go on about this and disease and a multitude of other topics, but I’ll save it) The second thing is stress management and sleep. I’m going to throw mental health in here..but it could totally be on its own. If you aren’t allowing your body to rest and recover, again it’s not going to help anything. And finally, exercise. Excercise will help with the stress and sleep part (in theory, again…I could take off on a rant here). But you need to strengthen your muscles, bones and keep your body moving. I didn’t mention water so I’ll throw it in here. Drink lots of water!!! I truly believe weight loss and overall health needs all 3 of these to get the results I’m looking for. It is so beyond just losing weight. It’s about overall health and not just a number on the scale.

Whew! There is so much to this! No wonder everyone wants to find a quick fix to health!

Disclaimer: Because we live in the world we live in today, I don’t want anyone to get their feathers ruffled. I am not a doctor or a nutritionist or have any training in any type of health field. I am expressing what I have learned through other professionals and my own experience. These are just my views and am not suggesting anyone follow anything that I have written without the consent of your healthcare professional (doctors, nutritionists etc.) Everything that I have written is my own personal thoughts and experiences. Please consult a doctor or health care professional before you attempt any diet or exercise program.

The next 3 months

Sep18

So I’m looking at the calendar and I’ve got 92 days until my 48th birthday. (GEEZE!) Gosh, that seems old! Well, beats the alternative! My goal was to be in the best shape I could be in when I hit 50. Okay. We’ve got 2 years. I think that’s realistic. As long as my overall goals are realistic! Obviously, some of my original goals have changed a bit. But, I’m thinking at this point I need to get down another 20 lbs. That puts me at 140. Which I think is a reasonable weight for a 50-year-old! I also have this idea that I want to build up my pecs. Now, this would be kind of a new goal. But after my mishap with the weight thing the other day, and current minor injury to the shoulder, I have to do a bit more research on the upper body weight training as it pertains to my current situation. The double mastectomy monkey wrench got thrown in there. But I think with some modifications, and probably a little different route, I can still obtain what I’m going for.

I’m going to concentrate on the cardio, weight training, nutrition and stress management. But most of all the diet. Boy, do I seem to struggle with this aspect of getting healthy. Again, same problem, so many different people telling you different things. It’s no wonder the American population is so overweight! The industry confuses everyone so they don’t know what to do. They seem to keep changing the rules on what’s good and what’s bad. SO….I suppose this is where 2016 is going to play into my favor. I obviously spent a lot of time last year talking to doctors and nutritionists on what is the best thing to eat and what is not. The first thing is to throw away all the weight loss books and forget about all the pills and everything else they say will help. No more listening to “the industry.” Now on the same note, I have to say that I found out that doctors don’t really know anything about nutrition. I mean they know medicine and they are not nutritionists. Which is exactly why there is a whole separate career as a dietician going on! I’ve talked to enough of them over the last year or so and realized they are all saying the same thing. What it all comes down to is Moderation. Do you need to cut out anything from your diet? No, you don’t. Are there things you shouldn’t eat? Well, of course, there are. Like the Cheetos flavored waffles are probably not a good idea. The hard part is I really really like all the bad things!

Now let’s see if I can remember everything I learned!!!!

Let the games begin!

In a mental limbo

Sep18

It’s been quite some time since I’ve contributed anything here. Been a bit busy with the business and trying to figure out what to do next! Trying to get a business up and running is a lot of work. In addition to the event planning (which is really just wedding planning at this point) I’ve been doing refinance signings. I’m not sure how I feel about that yet. But it’s something. Oh and the son got married 2 weeks ago, so I’ve been all over the place. It’s coming to the end of wedding season and I’m trying to come up with ways to promote the business as well as trying to figure out exactly which direction I want to go in with this. I live in an area that is very big on the DIY thing. Everyone thinks that planning is the same as organizing and decorating. Oh if it were only that much.

So in addition to all that I’ve been kind of struggling with my lack of care and thought about the whole cancer thing. I talk to people who have been through it and I don’t seem to really care about it as much as I think I should. I mean yes it happened. Yes, it was horrible. Yes, I never want to go through it again. But I’m finding that I’m moving on. Anniversaries are coming up and I look back and yes I get emotional over it. I think about how hard it was and how far I’ve come. I haven’t gone to a support group meeting in forever. And it’s not for any other reason other than I suppose I don’t really need the support anymore. But I start thinking, yeah, you don’t, but maybe you can help someone going through it who needs some sort of positivity. But then I think I don’t want to get pulled back into all that. I honestly and selfishly just want to put it behind me. Not to the point of pretending it never happened, but to just move on from it. I suppose it would be something like not wanting to live in the past or dwelling on it. But is that really what’s happening there? I mean there has got to be some balance there. This is one of those instances where you don’t have to go to extremes.

I just find it interesting that mentally this is where I am. I feel like I have no fear with things. I’m in this weird mental limbo. It’s like I don’t think, I just do things. Yet I over think and plan everything. I have a very strong lust for life and “just do it” kind of attitude but at the same time, I’m just numb. It’s a very interesting place. I feel like I’m trying so desperately to get out of the woods, but I’m not quite to the edge yet. Just when I think everything is “normal” something reels me back in to remind me. So I wonder if this is going to be my “new normal” or if I’m still in a transition. It seems like it all happened so long ago, yet I haven’t been out of treatment a year yet.

I sometimes feel like I jumped into things too soon. I have those “what the hell did I do?” moments. But then the panic stops and I feel like if I didn’t jump into things I wouldn’t be as far along with getting back to some sort of normalcy. I’m sure I’m totally over thinking all this. I need to just go with things and see where they take me!

So with that, I guess I can pick up on my little Diva journey where I left off. I still think it’s funny that this whole blog started off as a weight loss journey to reclaim my confidence back and this is how it played out. SOOOOO…..what have we learned from this little detour? Eat right. Exercise. Manage stress. Stay positive. Do what makes you happy. Live life to the fullest. You need to have a truly balanced life all around.

And so we resume Making of a Diva….